Day 51 - 8 left

I ate like crap today. Every single thing I put in my mouth was something I was not supposed to eat. And then I topped it off with ice cream. I didn't care. I wish I could be one of those people that didn't eat when they are stressed, but I'm not. When I'm stressed all I can think about is what I'm going to eat while I'm rolled up on the couch while watching bad movies.  I know I'm going to regret everything tomorrow, but I need to stress eat to get it out of my system and get with a new plan! I used to stress drink - to the point if cry it all out, then wake up the next day with a plan and move forward. So at least I stopped drinking - LOL, but I do feel like some wine is needed in my near future. 

I got the CT results back today. A 1.5mm and a 3mm kidney stone was found in my left kidney. So I get to keep my urology appointment so I can figure out how to remove the big one - sounds fun. I've had kidney stones before and it sucks!! Apparently not enough to drink water on a regular basis though, but now I'm thinking I'd rather, so today I'm downloading the drinking water app and start setting alarms as to when to drink water. Pretty sad I have to do that, but 21 days to form a habit right? So let's get with it! Gotta pass these stones, and stop them from returning!! 

Then the doctor says - "sometimes we find things we aren't necessarily looking for when we do these scans" - okay well that didn't sound very good. Then she told me she found a 1.5mm x 2.5mm soft tissue density mass in my endometrial canal. Ok well, a "mass" to me sounds like a nice doctor way of saying "tumor" - this isn't good. And now they want a pelvic ultrasound. And now commence "stress eating". I got the ultrasound done, results on Monday. I'm not going to lie though, I hope whatever it is causes me to get a hysterectomy - but not have it be a big enough reason to start chemo or anything else terribly scary. I'm done having babies, and hate getting my period!! Really tired of buying myself feminine products. But I don't think I'm strong enough to deal with anything scary or life threatening- not now. 

Again no exercise today - I just went to sleep. And tomorrow will be a new day. Not quite a new me - but a new day to restart what I was set out to do by December 31st! 8 of 10 eat whatever you want days left. 

A little visual for the size of my kidney stones.

A little peak into my dietary consumption 

I am happy with the way my clothes are currently fitting, but I know it can get better! Gettin back to the workout grind!!