Day 42 - So ashamed

Well I guess I don't have to worry about the Raisnets anymore. Why, do you ask? Yeah that's cuz I ate the whole rest of the bag for breakfast this morning. And yes, I did say the rest of the bag. Bad decision cost me half my allowed calories for the day, and gave me nothing but a stomach ache. I think I'm an addict. A sugar addict. I don't know why I thought I could control myself. Just a handful I said, it'll be good I said. Yeah right. Well it doesn't matter anymore because it's gone and I'm happy. It just really brings to light my addiction to crap food. And the first step is acknowledgement.

I know this isn't the worst offense in dieting history, or that one slip up is going to automatically put 10 lbs back on, but I'm just bothered by the fact that once this thing is in my mind it's almost an obsession until it's gone. Must have willpower. 

So because of my slip up, and needing to eat actual food the rest of the day I was way over calories. The most so far. I really wanted to go to the gym to run them down, but I didn't. Sleep was more important at the moment. My husband and I are down to 1 car. I work first shift, he works second. And because I have school and my bail bonds job he can't just take the car to work. So I have to drop him off and pick him up. This means I get 2 1/2 hours of sleep after school, I pick him up, then sleep for 2 more hours. I hope this chaotic schedule only lasts for a couple weeks. Until then I can only go to the gym on days I don't have school.  My life in a nut shell:) 

And I don't even know how I do it....

And there it is. So disappointing. 

Just say no!! The addiction is real.

#nuffsaid